When I'm not kicking anti-furry ass I'm...

...making comedy videos. Chris is over at my place, and we met up with Jack (of Mike and Jack fame) and went out, purely to record out antics and make a stupid video of them! :D Enjoy!

THIS is why the 'net exists

Okay, forget the other time I said why the internet exists. I've actually found it now. The internet exists so that people can act like whatever random carpfish they want without disrupting folk in the "real world."

Let me explain. Wikipedia is a "real world" place. It has information about real things; it's a resource, a tool. On the opposite end of the spectrum (we've all been there, admit it) we've got Illogicopedia, where users can type whatever godforsaken nonsense they wish and have the whole world laugh at it. The Chocolate War never happened! There's no such thing as a clog spider! Illogicopedia is where people go to relieve themselves after researching and typing out all the seriousness of the Wikimedia projects.

And it's where I've found a new home...

Political Rhetoric

You know it is all lies

We all know that George "Dubya" Bush - 43th president of the United States - is a god awful idiot. Hell, it's a one armed battle. EVERYONE knows that! There's not even a point in arguing anymore! Let's take a look at what the blogosphere has to say about America's Dumbest Presidents:

Well, currently going quite popular on a number of blogs is this link to The Daily Background, which shows the big gun in 15 of his most embarrassing situations. Want a sample? Go on then!

He reminds me of chavs. He struggles to string simple English together, they even released a book of mistakes when speaking his own language. That, combined with the fact he's also got a "one fingered victory salute" and a history of drinking problems, and you're looking at the perfect ASBO material! Just imagine the Commander-In-Chief with this bunch of scum.

"The best thing about my family is my wife. She is a great first lady. I know that sounds not very objective, but that's how I feel. And she's also patient. Putting up with me requires a lot of patience."

~ George W. Bush, Tipp City, Ohio, April 19, 2007

Okay, so he has enough sense to recognize he's an idiot. That's a plus point at least. However he still hasn't noticed that when an idiot is the current president it would probably be best to leave office at some point. Preferably now.

Now, at the top of the page there's a YouTube video. One of the many from the UK docu-drama Death of a President - the first broadcast TV show to show the death of a president still in office. Now that is brave. Sure this is the UK; it's not likely that the CIA or FBI are going to be busting down our doors anytime soon. But the point stands. Britain hates Bush. In turn, Britain hates Blair for supporting Bush. And this burden has only slightly been lifted by Blair's brilliant acting ability, as shown on national television earlier this year (and that is the real Tony Blair to any of you who don't know/are too stupid to realise.)

How much does Britain hate Bush? Check out this edition of the Daily Mirror from the day after he was re-elected back in 2004:

And this one from Private Eye:

I trailed off a bit there with ranting about how utterly pointless "number 43" is (Bush once called himself that). Anyway - put simply - he really outta be killed. 1 in 4 Iraqis knew someone who has since been killed by the invading forces. Saddam Hussein was executed for killing 150 Sunni Muslims. At the time of writing this 13,684 American Troops have been killed (from official statistics) and 68,141 Iraqi civilians (from unofficial records, the U.S. Army stopped counting when they ran out of fingers). That's 81,825 people George W. Bush has killed. And Saddam got executed for 150.... Now I'm not one for the death sentence, but I'll make an exception for Dubya.

Happy Zombie Jesus Day!

Mummy, why is my messiah eating my brains?

Zombie Jesus Day! The one day of the year when the Christians around this godforsaken planet celebrate the death ad resurrection of one man, one man called Jesus H. Christ!

Even people who don't read Bible passages for a living should know the story of how Mr Christ was brutally murdered, only to have risen - drooling and with arm slightly loose - out of his caven tomb and promptly ate the brains of his murderers. What? You think Judas committed suicide? He made a flipping fortune! Why would he?! No, he was actually revenged by Jesus, followed by the occasional Roman guard. It took a bit longer to get to evil overlord Pontius Pilate. But he managed to do it after a good many years.

From there it all fades into obscurity. But many myths say that every Zombie Jesus day, he mysteriously appears and eats the brains of unsuspecting victims. These deaths are usually thrown off by police as incidents involving chainsaws or witch craft. But they are true... and he's coming for you...

And so I leave you with what has to be the best Bible verse ever, Matthew 7:3.
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?"